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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23796604">i need you</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/maiselocked/pseuds/maiselocked'>maiselocked</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Umbrella Academy (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cuddles, Diego Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Diego Is Sad, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Post Fight, Protective Diego Hargreeves, Stuttering Diego Hargreeves, desperate diego, lonely diego, slight angst</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 23:08:17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,272</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23796604</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/maiselocked/pseuds/maiselocked</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>in which diego wakes up in the middle of the night in an empty bed after a fight and realizes that he needs you more than anything.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Diego Hargreeves/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>135</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>i need you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this fic came to me while i was listening to woke the f*ck up by jon bellion. please listen to it while you read</p><p>https://open.spotify.com/track/1zTW7xRtxmprjTUDi6bAHg?si=Qy9M8e8VQFy2-BHuCdANgw</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Diego Hargreeves didn't know what to do with himself. He stood in front of the front door to his small boiler-room-turned-apartment, mind mostly empty. One minute ago, you left in a hurry and slammed the door behind you.</p><p>The two of you had went out for an impromptu dinner date two hours earlier that was going well until your ex had came up to the table. You paid them no attention for the first few seconds until he placed a hand on your shoulder. Diego was ready to pull out the knives he had hidden on his body but with a slight look of warning from you, he stopped. Not wanting to be rude, you put on a face of fake politeness. </p><p>Your ex stayed there until you finished your food and signaled at Diego that you were ready to leave. As the two of you were getting up from your chairs, your ex grabbed your hand. "Call me?" They had said, placing a number in your hand. You didn't say anything and instead walked off, going to Diego's side. </p><p>The car ride back was filled with a thick tension and you knew that Diego was mad. He was protective, yes, and a tad bit possessive. You couldn't blame the man. This was the first time he had been in love since he was with Eudora and after losing both her and his mom, he wasn't going to lose you. The two of you remained silent even when you entered Diego's room. It wasn't until 5 minutes later that an argument between the two of you broke out. </p><p>"I just don't understand why you don't trust me!" was one of the last things you had shouted at him. Diego turned towards you quickly and grabbed your shoulders. You knew, deep down, he would never hurt you and that wasn't his intention but the strong grip he had on your shoulders began to hurt. </p><p>"D...," you struggled to get out. </p><p>"I do trust you! Why can't you understand that?!" Diego shouted directly into your face. The deathly serious look on his face, the grip he had on you, and the significant raise in volume in his voice all became too much for you. He wasn't able to read the expression on your face but he easily realized it as fear and stepped away from you. </p><p>"I-I'm sorry," he said, regret laced with his voice. "Y/N, I...I'm-"</p><p>"I'm gonna go home," you told him, voice so quiet he hardly heard it. </p><p>"N-No...Y/N." He could hardly get two words out before you were walking away from him and towards the door. </p><p>Now you were on your way home, tears threatening to spill from your eyes. You felt guilty for just leaving him alone like that, especially knowing he had some self-destructive tendencies, but you needed to get away from him and calm down before you could face him again. </p><p>Diego finally moved from the spot in front of his door and to his bed where he solemnly sat down. He stared straight ahead as the gears in his mind moved and worked to process what had just happened. "Fuck!" He shouted. He shot up, ran his hands through his hair, and sat back down again. That happened a few more times before he decided to change into some workout clothes. If this had happened a year or so ago, he would've been in the whole leather get up and doing his vigilante work but after he started to date you, the time he spent out on the streets declined as he spent more nights in bed with you. That had been a whole argument in itself when Diego once came home covered in bruises, blood, and cuts.</p><p>In place of his "work", he went out to the gym which had began to empty out as evening set in. Al was away in his office and only one or two regulars were using the large punching bags hanging around. He didn't bother to cover his hands as he moved to the bag and started punching it, releasing every ounce of stress and frustration that had been building in him since that gross ex of yours came up to your table. </p><p>Diego didn't notice that it was late at night until Al had came out of his office and told him to "give the punching bag a break, boy, you've been going at it for 4 hours". His knuckles were raw and slightly bloodied from the relentless workout.</p><p>He cleaned the bag off and trudged back to the boiler room. He was half hoping that you had sneaked into his room, ready to forgive him but he knew that was nowhere near the case. He sank down onto the bed, pulling the shirt he had on over his head and onto the floor. Diego's nose was filled with your easily recognizable scent of lavender as his head hit your pillow when he laid down. It successfully relaxed him, like it always did, and it wasn't long before he drifted off to sleep. </p><p>It wasn't four hours later when he jolted up from a nightmare. He didn't have them frequently but it was no surprise that he had one that night. It was fresh in his mind. Sequences of him yelling at you, you jumping back out of fear and promptly leaving him. It was just as it was in real life but you never came back. What if you never came back in real life too? </p><p>His heart rate quickened instead of slowing down as his mind ran rampant with the idea that he might have just lost you. Diego jumped from his bed and began pacing around the cold, concrete floor. "Shit, shit, shit," he mumbled. He pulled and ran fingers through knots and twists in his hair. </p><p>Diego leaned against his small kitchen counter. He knew that he couldn't do anything unless he calmed down and at least <em>tried</em> to form cohesive, coherent thoughts. The alarm clock across the room read 3:21 AM. You were asleep no matter how shaken up you were. He had come to learn your sleeping schedule and that your body demanded sleep by 2 AM. He didn't want to wake you but he needed you to know how incredibly sorry and awful he felt. If you didn't wake up or let him in, he would understand and would try in the morning. It would kill him to wait. He needed you. Not just then but all the time. </p><p>He could hear Sir Reginald Hargreeves chastising him for becoming so dependent on one person. He knew his siblings would question the deep love he felt for you. However, absolutely none of that mattered to him. He also didn't care that knocking on your door at 3 in the morning because he needed to be by your side was desperate.</p><p>Quickly, he threw on a black sweatshirt and shoved on shoes. Diego burst out of the boiler room and out of the gym and went towards your downtown apartment in a sprint. He only slowed down when the tall building you lived in came in view. </p><p>Inside, you were just beginning to fall into a deep sleep. Some tissues were strewn around the bed along with pillows that were providing you with warmth that Diego normally gave. A quiet snore came from you just a second before loud, fast knocking sounded at your door. You woke up with an unintelligible groan and string of words that sounded something like "Who the fuck and why the fuck?" </p><p>Diego was on the other side of the door, impatiently waiting for you to open it. He decided that he would wait 2 minutes in between his knocks and would leave after 15 minutes. You rose up from your den of thick blankets and pillows and stood up. You threw on a robe, deciding that whoever was at your door at 3 in the morning didn't deserve to see your pajamas (which were a pair of black shorts and a shirt of Diego's that reached just above the hem of the shorts). Diego was about to knock again when he heard shuffling from behind the door and the familiar click of the lock coming undone. </p><p>"What is it-" You had began to say before your eyes met Diego's. "Diego. It's 3 AM." You could've asked him to go home so you could get some sleep but truthfully, the look his eyes held told you that it'd be a shitty move to make him leave.</p><p>Whatever confidence he had before dissipated upon seeing you. He thought you looked beautiful at any time and this wasn't unlike those other times. He secretly loved seeing you just woken up when your hair was messy and falling out of its bun and when you looked so comfortable wearing his clothes. Seeing you in his shirt gave him hope that he could salvage what he had completely messed up earlier and he finally spoke to you. </p><p>"I know it's late b-but I had to t-t-talk to you. I was going crazy," he told you. He watched as you took a deep breath in and rubbed your eyes. Finally, you moved out of the way, allowing him inside, and shutting the door behind him. He took a few steps before he turned back to you. You stretched your arms out, the sleeves of Diego's shirt moving up. His whole body shivered when he saw the lightest finger-shaped bruises that had blossomed on your shoulder. He wondered for a second if he even deserved you. He hurt you.</p><p>You noticed that Diego was staring intently at your shoulder and you followed his gaze until you saw the bruises that had formed. </p><p>"Y/N..."</p><p>You quickly pushed the sleeves back down and looked back at Diego. </p><p>"Diego, look-"</p><p>"No. I-I'm so sorry. I fucked up. I know I d-did. You don't d-deserve someone who...who hurts you. Who sc-scares you."</p><p>You truly couldn't help but feel for the man in front of you. He must've been driving himself into so much self-doubt and fear that he was beginning to question if you even wanted to be with him anymore. You didn't feel guilty for leaving so abruptly but you did feel pity. You looked down at his hands that were still red from punching the bag earlier.</p><p>"If you don't want t-to talk to m-me anymore, I get it. If...if you want to leave, I get that too." His heart dropped to his stomach when he said that and he could feel tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. It hurt him <em>so</em> bad to say it and he wouldn't be okay if you left. He would be far from okay. "God...I just...I woke up and I-I realized I n-needed you and I didn't know what to d-do so I came here and I'm s-sorry for waking you up. I had a nightmare for the first time in a month and you left and you never came back and I don't want you to leave. I <em>really</em> don't want you to leave but I know I fucked up-"</p><p>"Shut up. For just one minute. Please, baby," you said, cutting off his incessant rambling. </p><p>"Okay. Sorry."</p><p>You sighed and ran a hand down your face as you tried to find words. "You just...you scared me. That's all. I-I got overwhelmed. It was a lot, Diego."</p><p>"I know-"</p><p>"I'm not done." Diego couldn't help but slightly smile at you. "I'm not leaving you. I couldn't if I tried. Hell, I had to put on your shirt and surround myself in pillows and blankets just to go to sleep without you. Please don't think I'm leaving because I got scared."</p><p>You came up to him and placed a hand on his cheek. With no hesitation, he leaned into your touch, closing his eyes at the sensation. "I'm a little annoyed that you woke me up but D, I need you just as much as you need me."</p><p>He opened his eyes and looked at your tender expression. He pulled your hand from his face and held it in his. "I promise I won't scare you again. I won't be a d-dumbass. I won't give you bruises anymore."</p><p>"Don't make any promises about the bruises, Diego. I know how you are in bed."</p><p>He laughed at your dry joke and pulled you closer to him. "Fine. But I promise that I won't do anything I did ever again." </p><p>You smiled at him and reached up on tiptoes to give him a kiss. He easily returned it, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you impossibly close to him. </p><p>"I love you," he whispered when the two of you broke apart.</p><p>"I love you too, Diego," you said back to him. A bright, genuine smile came to his face. "But can we please go back to bed, D?"</p><p>"Yes, baby." You reached your arms out to him. He got the message and easily picked you up and carried you back to your bedroom bridal-style. The two of you fell into the normal bedtime routine: both of you getting under the covers, fluffing your pillows just the way you like them, and pressing to each other back to chest. Diego held you a little tighter that night and gave you a few extra goodnight kisses. He was absolutely determined to never give you a reason to leave him. He needed you and he would admit that forever and always.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i started this at about 6 in the evening and refused to go to sleep until i finished. it is now 1:07 AM and i am going to bed the minute this is posted.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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